Wonder WOAHman!

It’s hard to imagine how movies were made before the Marvel Cinematic Universe existed. I know that they did, obviously there were movies pre-2008, but in a day and age filled with super-powered heroes, villains and anti-heroes clogging up the big screen I struggle to remember a time before.

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I want it to go on record that I did not hate Wonder Woman. I didn’t. No matter what you read in this article, I did enjoy the movie. No movie is without flaws, and Wonder Woman is a prime example of what could have been something epic but failed to completely deliver.

The opening act brings us to Theymyscira, the Paradise Island of the Amazons, a civilization of ONLY female warriors and quickly we are introduced to Diana, daughter of Hippolyta the leader. We see her training through the years to become a powerful warrior and we hear the story about how the Gods were betrayed by Ares the god of war and that with Zeus’ dying act of heroism he weakened Ares to the point of near death and gave the Amazons a powerful weapon in case he were to ever return The Godkiller. Diana progresses into adulthood and is soon the most powerfully trained Amazon, she eventually scares her peers when she lets out a huge surge of godly power.

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Enter Steve Trevor. An American pilot who crashes into the water close to the shore of the once thought invisible Theymyscira. Diana being the natural hero she is dives into the water and rescues him, the beach is stormed by the Amazons bows drawn and ready to kill this male intruder. Enter the German Navy. Ships begin to come through the barrier and start firing onto the beach presumably to kill Steve Trevor. An epic battle of German soldiers and Amazon warriors commences, leaving the

homefield the victors.

That’s when this movie gets a little less epic, Diana and Steve eventually leave Theymyscira to bring back a book of secret deadly poison weapons to the heads of the armies. Hilarity ensues as Diana struggles to find real clothes. Can’t figure out why no one will let her talk. Tries to hide a sword in her sophisticated era appropriate pants suit. And totally reverses the damsel in distress roll by protecting the cunning Army man when attacked in an alley.

Don’t get me wrong these parts were great. They added some humor into what has up to this point been a very cut and dry- war/woman out of time/coming of age tale.

The humor aside it also shows the struggle of women trying to get their voice heard, echoing feminist cries heard even today. She asks questions like “Where are the women soldiers?” and wonders why she isn’t allowed in the war room full of males. It honestly didn’t feel like enough. Every where she went Steve was veering her in another direction, and she followed? I know its an origin story but it doesn’t feel like the empowered bad-ass that has always been Comic Book Wonder Woman.

Some more stuff happens from this point, we get a renegade group of military “experts” to help the duo on their mission to go to the front line of the war. Steve wants to go to stop Doctor Poison, the films secondary antagonist and owner of the book of DOOM! But Diana wants to go to confront Ares head on. Because if there is war, it has to be Ares.

That’s pretty much her entire motive for leaving her home. For going on this adventure. She is hell bent on stopping this God and she is doubted at every turn.

Once they make it to the war zone, the no mans land in the middle of trench warfare that world war 1 was famous for, she decides enough is enough. Finally she has her badass moment and just walks straight through No Mans Land deflecting bullets, dodging mortars, and knocking out anyone who gets in the way.

Amazing.

Then…we get into the final act. She finds her way to an airport where they are loading Doctor Poison’s grand-kill-them-all-gas. She confronts this German general and eventually shoves her god-killer sword through him thinking he is the God Ares. But we all know this is a red-herring, he died way too easy. Surprise! It was the classic, general you trusted was actually the bad guy all along, scenario.

Steve Trevor sacrifices himself by flying the gas plane as high as he can and triggering an explosion, this makes Wonder Woman pissed and she proceeds to fight what I can only assume is a weakened god of war. They go blow for blow and its looks like she might be losing the fight when he reveals that the sword isn’t the god-killer but she is! She was the gift from Zeus to stop Ares but together they can rule the world. Another big god like eruption of power and then all of a sudden she can fly and can shoot lightning bolts. Ares is defeated. The soldiers on the ground stop fighting and start high fiving each other and act like nothing is wrong.

The End. Basically.

Again, not a bad movie, entertaining even. Being invested in the Marvel Cinematic Universe has set this bar for super hero movies. So far DC has failed to deliver. Man of Steel was ok. Batman v. Superman was utterly garbage in my opinion. Suicide Squad was a high adrenaline mess of reshoots. Wonder Woman was their best movie so far. I will admit I have a lot of love for the movie I just don’t consider it one of the best out there.

For starters there was WAY TOO MANY comparisons between this movie and Captain America: The First Avenger.

Both films had a Captain Steve, both were set during World Wars, both films had their main characters using shields, both films were against the Germans. Both films had a shady enhanced German general who renounced his superiors and both had a creepy scientist willing to follow that General. Both films had a ragtag team of soldiers willing to go where no one else would, the Howling Commandos for Captain America and I’m not sure what they called themselves in Wonder Woman. Both films show out main character as a weak and unsure character with high morals turn themselves around, although one is with training and the other is with an experimental drug. Both films had the characters drop into a zone considered too dangerous for anyone to go to and were warned that they would not make it through alive. Both films had their Captain Steve sacrifice himself in a giant plane carrying a world ending weapon of mass destruction. Both movies end with our hero in modern time contemplating all the things they’ve done in their past and reminiscing on the people they no longer have.

Whew. Sorry about that. Probably missed some but you get the point.

Wonder Woman herself Gal Gadot was a little shaky keeping her character consistent, her accent seemed to slip in certain parts, and her conviction wavered at times despite the fact that she is literally on one mission to stop Ares. Chris Pine’s Steve Trevor was fairly consistent is not a little underwhelming, he did offer the comic relief and a lot of exposition. The minor characters outside of Theymyscira were forgettable at best and at no point do you really connect with any of them. Diana’s mother and Aunt were very well acted if just a little too by-the-book stone cold warrior.

The special effects were fantastic, the score felt right, the sets and the over-all look of the movie were fantastic. I can’t say enough good things about the feel of the movie, you never once thought that the movie was done on a sound stage.

If you want to be entertained by all means, go see this movie. It is good. I just don’t think it’s as good as it could have been.

For this movie I rate it 6/10. Normally it would be about a 6.5 or 7 but the comparisons to Captain America made me drop it down a bit.

Well, I hope you enjoyed the read at least and found this a little informative.

Catch ya next song.

Rich the Bard.